I’m fully aware I’m a bit different than most people. It’s funny even as I type that statement I automatically go back to thinking I’m not different at all; but I do look at the world with a perspective that isn’t in line with the majority. One glaring but hidden notion came up as I looked at pictures of my Facebook friends and suggested friends. All I noticed was same; and when I say same I really only mean they all have friends of the same race. Where was the diversity?
I’ve always been one who enjoyed learning about other cultures. I know black culture. I live it everyday and if I had zero black friends ( which I don’t) I have plenty of relatives I can still hear black history and current black pop culture from. I wouldn’t say I go out of my way for Asian, Hispanic or Foreign friends but I do perk up at the prospect because I know I will be getting something extra out of knowing that person. It isn’t that I can’t have friends that offer nothing besides their friendship and loyalty but we are on this planet for such a short time; I want to get the most out of it and I can’t do that with people who have my exact ideas, interests, and position in life. So yes it is more likely I will look for people outside of my race and comfort zone but I’m not seeing that in many people I know.
One look through your Facebook, Twitter or Instagram followers will tell you where you stand on the issue. If you are white and have sprinkles of color, it might not be a bad idea to ask why. Yes the same goes for black people, and Hispanic. I can go one further to the subcategories of the gay community when I have bear friends who only hang out with other bears ( typically white bears but I’ve spoken before on race in the gay community ). It’s like everyone wants to speak about diversity in movies and in the work place but for sure not in their own lives. I even decided after my online revelation to watch the pack animals in their natural habitat and I still was hard pressed to find groups of people that even had one other around of a different race.
How in the world does anyone expect diversity anywhere? This is one of those situations where I can only vent rather than offer any answers. Truth be told I hate that because it doesn’t resolve the problem. The fact is its comfortable to be around people who look like you. One can assume that someone else who enjoys the same music, clothes and food might also fit around your other friends better because guess what, they are just another set of clones. It’s also reasonable to assume that same clone might work better at your firm because of similar upbringing of clones marrying clones. Safety is nice, reasonable is nice but it does nothing for the spirit and soul and any idea of growth.
I can honestly say I have a super diverse group of friends. It’s not a mission and I feel it’s only because I don’t tend to look at color. Even my long ( super long ) list of exes are so diverse in age, race, size, attitude, you name it because all I see is the soul, which doesn’t have all the qualifiers we put onto people. This is one of the traits I love about myself and wasn’t taught. My parents are clones also but interestingly enough my sister and I aren’t. I can’t say why we both have a pretty big and diverse set of friends but I appreciate her for it. No one is running away from our culture to learn and appreciate someone else’s. We just are excepting of what people want to share of themselves, and like anyone will reject what is out of balance with our lives.
Make no mistake I don’t hunt down Jewish friends because it’s lacking in my portfolio. I don’t exclude black friends because I’ve hit my quota. And I for sure don’t worry about the optics if I happen to be with a few of my white friends being the only chocolate chip in the bunch ( sometimes I do and I use to a lot ). But I am at the point I don’t want to hear about diversity. It just seems like yet another hot button issue for the talking heads on Fox News and CNN.
I will continue to do me, be friends with whomever and just experience what is out there. But I can’t say my heart isn’t currently very heavy.